Of self finding and losing

It's been almost half a semester I'm back to college. Life is a little different now. For the past few months, I lost myself. But I finally found myself again after facing some problems. I think things will turn for the better now.

It's really complicated on how to explain how I had actually lost myself. Lets just simply put it as I've lost my sense of direction. I lost focus on what I had ever wanted to achieve. But the most important part is I must never let myself lose control.

In the few months that had made the half semester, I found out that taking up things are easy, the only problem lies with letting go. How do you actually let go of something you have become rather attached to? The answer to that might lie within myself, and maybe self reflection could enlighten me.

Every day is a new beginning and ends when the new day arrives. Leave the past behind but embrace the lessons, and live the day like you are meant to live. Enjoy every feeling you have ever felt and part when it's time to part.

That's all for today i guess.. Some nonsentical blabber I just feel like writing out. heh.. later

A moment of reprive

Well as anticipated, the break finally came right after the exams ended. As usual, it's time to rest and prepare myself for the war that is brewing just beyond the horizon. Life at home is of course comfortable, there's a quote which says "no place like home" I suppose that is what it means.

Anyways these few days at home had been fun but yet not fruitful. I suppose that breaks are supposed to be like that. Taking off your burdens for a bit and then let yourself enjoy before setting off on another journey. I honestly hope that the next journey will lead me closer to my target.Life's journey consists of frequent crossroads and we can't never travel both. When the choice is made, we can't go back to where we start.

That's that for this entry.. nothing much to say anyways.. later

Towards the end

Only two weeks left till the end of the semester. Life seems to be more bustling with life in these recent days. I guess the main reason is because end of sem exams are coming soon and everyone are changing into their study gears. Though there still seem to be some who are still slacking away. Anyways it's their choice.

The week so far had been crazy, really crazy. A week filled with quizes and exams. Everyone just seem so well busy i guess preparing for it. Nevertheless, some people are still trying to slack till the eleventh hour before they finally want to make a move. I suppose doing that for them is really alright, i mean there are some people who could do it after all. As for me, the eleventh hour proves too short a time for me. So it's time to tighten up that belt and hold on tight for the last ride for the sem.

I'm so looking forward to going home after so many months out here. It sure is nice being able to stay at home. Well not that i get much studying done at home but well at least i can rest up a bit at home before another gruesome long semester starts. Heh, well now is not the time to think bout that..

Time to work hard and kick ass...

ciox..

In a sea of doubt...

The past few weeks had been just crazy. Fluctuating moods, emotions and additude left me standing there speechless with an utterly blank expression on the skin you call a face. Assignments after assignments and the test that just passed a few days, didn't manage to turn me into a sleep deprived zombie, rather I somehow have a habit to take long afternoon naps now.

To tell the truth, long afternoon naps is acting as a double edge sword. It lets me stay up late into the night but leaves me drained in the morning ;more energised in the evening but less time to do work and other stuff in the afternoon. Well I guess it really is time to do some balancing out and more time reflecting on it.

During these few solitary weekends in an almost deserted college, I found myself lost again. Lost as in lost my direction for the future. All this time I am aiming to be a Doctor, but then again is becoming a Doctor what I really want out of life? Can my mediocre results and big lazy bone pull me through all the years needed to be a full fledged Doctor? I really don't know. But one thing is for sure, that is to take things one step at a time. Come on I mean taking all the pure science subjects in A levels can't be that bad right? Or am I wrong?

Coming back to recent events, the outbreak of A (H1N1) disease has finally reached more than 100 cases in Malaysia. More and more people in my class are catching flu, and minor sickness in the recent weeks. Would an outbreak of A (H1N1) disease happen here in Inti Uc? If it does would I be a victim? I'm not really afraid of it though. I believe if a person's will is strong enough, the person would be able to overcome the disease(with medical aid of course).

In other news, King of Pop, MJ, passed away due to a cardiac arrest.Cardiac arrest is one of the top killers in the world, and i guess even the king of pop could not avoid it. Well rest in peace Michael Jackson, God bless your soul. This also serves a reminder to be more health concious and be wary of what you eat. As the saying goes "You are what you eat."

Well other than some minor events that happened to me, like getting a new handphone, having some not too good test results, playing some Dragonica, and etc. That's bout all I have to write for this entry. Well that's that.

Later..

ROLLER COASTER @.@ !!

It's been more than a month since I last tread into Inti UC.. Life here is really a rollercoaster ride. There are days so bad you wish you haven't woken up on that day at all; there are also days where things goes on so smoothly that you forget what even happened on that day itself.Maybe this is what they mean by a rollercoaster life? Pehaps it was meant to be that way.

These few weeks of my life had been so busy. There are just too much to be done and too little time. It's all really crazy. There are test coming up, MPW projects to be done, revisions to be done, guitar to practice, dance to learn.. Seriously I think i'm going insane. Sometimes i wish the week is one day longer, then I'd have more time to get things done. But life would be meaning-less that way. I mean to live life to the fullest is to used up every damn moment of it rite? That is what I think.

My phone broke down again. The damn thing keeps on giving me problem... So I'm going to get a new phone. This time I'm changing back to nokia,a freaking durable phone model.. I think it can last for a longer time now without giving me any problems.

Ever since I started to accept things as they are, I felt that I really have less to lement on and less problems to worry about. Just take things on as they come a long, taking one step at a time. Perhaps that's the pace I should take. I might not be the best in everything, but I think I should be okay if I give it my all.

That's all today..

Ciaox..

A new life ???

The long awaited college life has begun. It's been more than a week since i arrived here in Inti University College located in Nilai, Negeri Sembilan. The first few days of orientation reminded me so so so so much of plkn camp. Group games and all. As usual you need a group name and cheer, IT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE ALWAYS HAVE TO DO IN PLKN CLASSES! These are normal things for me, but i'm appointed group leader? =.=!!

Well orientation passed rather quickly. The activities were not that bad after all. The first week of lectures are mostly introduction of ourselves and getting to know more bout our syllabus. Well it's okay. Some of the lecturers had already begun teaching a little of the syllabus. It's rather interesting. Though I think i'm already seeing stars.. Haha.. I can thank the 6 months of not studying. I NEED BRAIN POLISH!! HAHAHA!

ok i guess it's time for pictures! LA~

My hostel.. Block P ^^

The english language center.. I don't think i'll need to go in there.. lol

basketball court! I don't play here.. lolz.. not my type of ball..

they have seats here at basketball court..

Ok this is the place i will go to.. lol.. swimming pool!

The mental problem hospital.. lol..na its the multi purpose hall..

The toilet is that way >>>>

Squash court... but the door reflects light

<

Bridge to lectures! The bridge of information hahaha..

The fooball field is yonder!

The slope actually looks steep from the bridge.. hahaha


Thirsty? Drink here!

The learning resource centre.. The library is inside!

Class rooms are labeled this way

And they look like this!

Crossroad of fate.

Sec school ended a long time ago. But, that itself was not a beginning. The real story began after spm results were released. As usual the first few chapters of the book is nothing useful, other than the basic introduction to the main character and some minor characters that will soon be forgotten towards the end. My life, is currently in that chapter. Days slowly passed by, and I await the arrival of the letter that will determine the progression of my story.

With each different choice made, there will be a different ending, a different path. For now I just really hope I can get into "matrikulasi" local matriculation.During this global economical crisis, it's a very crucial that I get that for it will ease the burden shouldered by my aging parents.

The path ahead is not an easy one. I can already foreshadow the events yet to come. Yet, all I can do now is wait and nothing but wait as the future slowly flips over, unrevealing itself as the present. The story had begun, but the future has not been decided, the ending has not been drafted. Perhaps this calm and smooth going perface of mine is actually the calm before the storm.